Boy, was I duped last week when I read—and believed—the November 2007 Trendwatching report, my jaw dropping as I came across the headlines “Generation Z,”  “Eco-Fatigue,” and “Blandtastic” (www.trendwatching.com).Yes, as with most situations in which things seem off-kilter, I did have the nagging gut feeling that some of the information was just too outlandish to believe. However, there was just enough “truthiness” (a term coined by satirical superstar Stephen Colbert) to pull me in. Thank goodness I noticed a follow-up email from Trendwatching the next day announcing their little joke, or else this week’s top story would have touted the return of bland!

 

Embarrassed, I contacted branding and consumer behavior expert Michal Ann Strahilevitz, Marketing Professor at Golden Gate University, and one of demo dirt’s most trusted and respected sources. I told her how easily I had been suckered, and she soothed my bruised ego by explaining that the all the satirical articles had indeed been inspired by reality, though these concepts exist on a much less dramatic scale in real life.

 

For example, how could I have possibly fallen for marketing to the unborn? The Generation Z story touted a “study” revealing that playing jingles to babies in utero ensures ready-made customers for eager businesses. Well, yeah, okay. Actually, I wouldn’t be surprised, considering that Joe Camel used to lure kids to cigarettes, McDonald’s made itself a kid addiction by giving away cheap little toys with its disgusting “Happy Meals” and there are more ads airing for sugary cereals and other nasty processed “foods” during cartoons than any beleaguered parent would like to know.

 

Eco-fatigue? Well, it wouldn’t surprise me. There has been so much greenwashing that we are bathing in a sea of green; if there were to be a backlash during which people decided to say “Hey green this, buddy” it wouldn’t shock me. It would disappoint me, yes, but given people’s laziness, resistance to change, intrinsic selfishness and basic cynicism (uh….including my own, I’m hearing myself) I have actually been dreading a green repercussion. I get embarrassed when I see “going green” exploitation, kind of like how I pitied the fools who bought into “carb-free” water during the Atkins craze, or who binged on boxes of Snackwell’s cookies during the fat-free fad. When a concept becomes too trendy, too idealized, it can be mishandled and its original purpose muddied. In fact, Strahilevitz forwarded me a recent Business Week cover story, “Little Green Lies,” which questions the validity of some green business practices outright.  

 

Blandtastic? Sure, why not. In this country, millionaires go shopping in track suits and sneakers, something which many middle class Europeans would never do. Here, one Juicy Couture t-shirt goes for $98.00 (but it has puffy sleeves!) And “simple” has really been in for a while…just see Calvin Klein’s Spring 2008 collection for women, or any season by Michael Kors. Clean lines, basic shapes, and seas of beige, black, gray and white stare back at you from the glossy pages of fashion magazines in an orgy of simplicity. In fact, Strahilevitz emailed me with a message that although the "Blandtastic" article was satire, being simple is indeed big, and it's about "No frills. No glitter BUT QUALITY. This is not new. The wealthiest folks on the west coast are often seen wearing very simple clothing and you can find millionaires shopping at Trader Joe's," she explains. "Steve Jobs wears black mock neck turtlenecks and simple jeans or khakis. Bill Gates and his wife are not seen in Versace as often as Eddie Bauer, and the folks that work at Google (yes even the billionaires), seem to be choosing comfort, quality and simplicity over style and pretentiousness when it comes to clothing."

 

As Trendwatching says, “satire thrives on nuggets of truth. And in an anything-goes world, what is fake today, could be real tomorrow. So please question, think, discuss, and argue." Yeah, they got me, but they made their point. Right on.